In recent months, I have become more deeply convinced of the danger of pride and the value of humility. Pride is the gate through which we enter all other sins. Humility is the way out. And the way to stay out.
After struggling for more than 30 years with this central charicteristic of Christianity—humility—I’d like to share some of what I’m learning. I still fail more often than I succeed. But I think God has shown me some things along the way that might serve your journey. If so, hallelujah!
1) I will redirect my speech. If I’m talking about myself, I try to notice and turn the conversation to the other person. I can’t do this so much that I close myself off to others. That’s a different sort of arrogance. Still, talking about myself less tends to result in thinking of myself less.
2) I will simply say “thank you” or “that’s very kind” when someone compliments me. No commentary is needed. This is so hard for me. I want to thank them and deflect. Most of the time I attempt to do that, however, I end up in the land of #humblebrag.
3) I will redirect glory to God. If someone begins to attribute things to me that only God can do, that seems like the right exception to #2. Still, I’ll be brief.
4) I will talk less. The less I talk, the less I’m likely to talk about myself. And the less I talk about myself, the less I think about myself.
5) I will redirect to the other person. When asked a question about myself, if I can answer briefly and then ask the other person to share their perspective, this helps. In my fallenness, though, I typically have a lot I want to say and so I stink at this.
6) I will think about myself less — feeling pity, pride, or preoccupation — I want to am learning to “cast, give thanks, and refocus.” I cast my cares on my Father, because He cares for me. I thank Him that He’s got this—my pity, pride or preoccupation. And then I refocus. Usually this looks like getting busy serving someone else.
7) I will continually remind myself that it’s a lot better to humble myself than it is to be humbled by God.
8) I will never one-up someone in conversation. I will celebrate their accomplishment without comparing it to my own.
9) I will ask more questions than I will give answers. Humility looks more like a student than a teacher. Pride gives answers. Humility asks questions.
10) I will relentlessly pursue affirming others without regard for reciprocation.
11) I will live from a place of God’s love and acceptance so I don’t have to seek love and acceptance from people.
12) When my feelings get hurt, I will recognize this as a source of pride. And I will allow that broken, fallen part of me to die. For "my old self has been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me.” My flesh gets its feelings hurt. Christ in me does not.
Some of you will recognize this is not all original thinking. (Is anything?) But I have drawn on things I’ve learned from several influencers in recent years: Tim Harris, Louie Giglio, Rick Roepke, and others. I am grateful for those voices in my life—in person, in writing, in podcasts, etc.
Do you have any tips to share?
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