Her words cut me deeply. They weren't meant to be insulting, I know. But when we sat down in the cafeteria for lunch after the service, I wanted to talk with everyone at our big table, a "10 top." It was noisy. There were many folks stopping by the table to talk with me--people from the worship ministry. The ministry I'm charged to lead.
This sweet lady and her wheelchair-bound teenage daughter started to leave. I apologized for not getting to spend a few minutes getting to know them. And then she spoke the words that still cut deeply today, more than a year later:
"It's okay. You need to spend time with your music people."
Do you see why her words were wounding?
I don't lead music people in worship.
Music people--of whom I am one--lead God's people in worship.
If I don't know the people I'm leading in worship, I can't lead them well.
And yet I justify myself, "There is so much team building, logistical coordination, spiritual coaching, not to mention just knowing those on the team! How can I lead a team and lead a congregation?"
[Someone else once wanted to justify himself, and Jesus told him the story of the Good Samaritan.]
Honestly, I'm not sure I know how to do this well, but I have a trio of ideas. I'm eager to know what you do, too.
1) Get off the stage. I can't serve the spiritual journey of people I don't know. Individuals. Families. Groups. Even communities. So I need to spend time off the stage and in the rows of seats, meeting people. Then asking them about their story. Rather than retreat to my office or a green room or a huddle of worship leaders, we need to break the huddle and know those we lead.
2) Pastoral Care. My pastor continually encourages me in this direction. When I care for one of the senior adults, I demonstrate that I care for all senior adults. A word of caution--I don't consider this a political calculation. I consider it an extension of Christ-in-me. I think of it as caring for those whom I desire to lead to the throne of grace. They are far more likely to follow me if I love them well.
3) Pray. I need to start each day asking God to provide divine opportunities for me to connect with those in my church. I need to pause each day and ask God to do something magnificent in the lives of folks in my church who are struggling. I need to pause each time I've heard from someone in the church--maybe on the spot--and pray for/with them. And to do this, I need to leave margin in my schedule for this kind of prayerful relationship building.
How do you do this, brothers and sisters? How do you care for the people you lead in worship?
